Your Pops! Let's look at daddy issues & joint pain

PLUS: Are you a bona fide Gen X-er? Check our list of tell-tale signs!

Jun 16, 2024

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When I worked as an editor at The Jenny Jones Show a million years ago, my team shared the sound stage with the notorious Jerry Springer Show — and many of his “expert” guests. One was a “father lawyer” who used to run his mouth in my office and walk around like he ran the place because, let’s face it, he was a hit on both shows and for good reason. The polarized expectations of fatherhood in our society and the suggestion of its future impact have rattled our minds (and hearts) since Freud presented his bizarre Oedipus complex in 1899. Modern theories offer that dads’ presence in their kids’ lives impacts everything from romantic relationships to career success, specifically with a cultural obsession on how it affects us women.

“Daddy’s little girl” to “daddy issues,” many of us feel a lifelong identity crisis with the man who did or didn’t raise us.

Dr. Linda Nielsen, professor at Wake Forest University and author of Improving Father-Daughter Relationships: A Guide for Women and their Dads, says “the overall effect of having a strong father-daughter relationship prepares the girl to become a teenager and a woman who is better able to deal with stress.”

Neilsen explained that being a good role model for a partner or demonstrating a work ethic impacts how women assess risk, approach challenges, and develop security and confidence in forming relationships. She concluded that:

Women with healthy father-daughter relationships perform better in the 3Ms: Money, men, and mental health.

Money: Having a strong relationship with our dads, according to Neilsen, allows us to get better grades, enter into STEM professions, and have more confidence, agency, and assertiveness — all of which get us better jobs and more money, she concludes.

Men: This isn’t so much about how Dad treats Mom, but about how he makes his daughter feel. Neilson says that feeling loved by our fathers prevents us from seeking attention or approval to fill a void, creating security in ourselves, and thus, quality expectations from our partners.

Mental health: “The result of having a physically and emotionally present dad appears to be more emotionally resilient and self-confident women, who report less anxiety disorders and depression,” reported Forbes on Neilsen’s research.

Our 3Ms: Manifestation, mastery, and memories

Some of us are glowing in a halo of love right now, while others feel resentment or apathy. Whatever your experience growing up, I firmly believe that we have the power to impact our futures — to take all the good and all the ugly and make a version of us that can be exactly who we want to be, manifesting our reality, mastering whatever we damn well please in our careers, and creating impactful and beautiful memories with those we love.

Happy Father’s Day.

Noisy joints and when to be concerned

By Emily Ornberg

As you move through the day, you may notice your joints snap, crackle, and pop concerningly loudly. By some estimates, twice as many women experience osteoarthritis (OA) and OA joint pain as men, and this difference, as a recent study found, is amplified during menopause.

So, what exactly is that crackling, creaky sound?

It’s called “crepitus” and it happens when air bubbles in the fluid that surrounds your cartilage gets released after certain movements. (Actually, chiropractors manually induce these air bubbles during a back-cracking.) Most of the time, it’s no big deal. If not caused by an injury, medical condition, or disease, crepitus is harmless. But, sometimes it could be a warning sound of a bigger problem.

Why can noisy joints be painful?

On the other (creeky) hand, the noise could also be the result of arthritic damage. Arthritis can cause swelling that changes the way the joints move. Osteoarthritis (OA) is known as the wear-and-tear type of arthritis that typically affects people as they age. As joints rub together, the resulting breakdown of the cartilage causes swelling and pain. If the joint cushioning is destroyed, the crepitus sound will be the painful grinding of bone against bone.

Ways to protect your joints and ease arthritic pain

Getting regular exercise is crucial in keeping your joints protected. As we age, our joints naturally lose some of their cartilage, which can lead to pain, stiffness, and swelling. Motion is lotion for the body. Exercise helps to strengthen the muscles around your joints, which can help to stabilize and support them.

Here are 5 additional things you can do to help keep your joints healthy and mobile:

1. Maintain a healthy weight

Excess weight puts stress on your joints, which can lead to inflammation and pain.

2. Eat a healthy diet

Eating a diet rich in fruits, vegetables, and whole grains can help to reduce inflammation.

3. Try supplements

While it is not for certain that supplements can fully de-creek your joints, two 2022 studies on collagen peptides reported promising results. One found that when paired with resistance training, collagen peptide supplementation can help promote connective tissue recovery, decrease pain, and improve strength and body composition. The other found that collagen-derived peptides may help in the prevention and treatment of tendinopathy — when muscle to bone becomes inflamed (though more research is needed).

4. Avoid overuse and repetitive motions

Repetitive motions can put stress on your joints and lead to pain. If you have a job that requires you to do a lot of repetitive motions, try to take breaks throughout the day to rest your joints.

5. Take breaks

When you’re sitting or standing for long periods of time, take breaks to get up and move around. This will help to keep your joints from getting stiff.

If you are experiencing noisy joints, see a doctor to understand the root cause and rule out any underlying medical conditions. The caveat here is that most doctors aren’t trained in menopause (a recent survey of OB/GYN residency programs finds that only 31.3% of programs had any type of menopause curriculum in their training). So, they may not consider the menopause connection without your sharing some evidence — like the study cited earlier — with them.