We asked how long you want to live and you said ...
+ Meet the author of the Amazon bestseller that Dr. Kelly Casperson calls "honest and empowering"
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In my early 30s, a palm reader told me I would live to be 88, and I was cool with that. Eighty-eight seemed like the perfect age to go. I thought, “I can do a lot of living before then.”
And then I hit my upper 40s. Now I’m thinking I’d like to live into my late 90s, if possible. I tried one of those online life expectancy calculators, and it predicted I’d live to 95 — if I can lower my cholesterol (not my fault; thanks, Mom and Dad).
All of this is to say that I’m curious how old other people in my age group want to live. So I asked The Midst community about a month ago, and here’s what you said …
Mimi Ison, 62, Instagram fitness star
“A long lifespan plus long healthspan are goals. Lifespan are the years lived, and healthspan are the years lived well.
Obvi, anyone can have bad luck with their health at any time, but I prioritize staying strong and active today to mitigate risks the best I can, and prepare for my old person body.”
, founder of Mixed Race Tape
“I only want to live as long as my hair looks good. It’s 75% of my personality.”
Kate Higgins, a licensed therapist-turned-coach for women 40+
"I want to live as long as I am happy, healthy, curious and adventurous. I don't want to outlive my joy."
Tiffany Nieslanik, writer and community builder
“My kids have asked that I live to be 123. Their reasoning? The oldest woman on record was 122 and they think I should try to beat that 😅, so I am striving for anything over 100. Maybe 102? Both of my grandmothers lived to be in their late 90s so it seems possible. 🤞🏼”
Dr. Maggie Ney, naturopathic doctor, 47
Target age: At least 80
“It's not about a specific number for me — it's about how I live. I want a life filled with health, vitality, and purpose. My deepest desire is to remain active, mobile, and mentally sharp all the way through, right up until my last breath.
Of course, I'd love to live long enough to see all of my girls feeling settled and fulfilled in their own lives, whatever that looks like for them. That would bring me incredible peace and joy.
If I had to put a number on it, I’d say I’d love to reach at least 80 — in excellent health. But more than longevity, I value a life well-lived. When my time comes, I’d like to feel grateful, complete, and ready for my next spiritual adventure.”
Pamela DeRose, holistic health coach
“I’m fascinated with longevity and the research is coming at us hard and fast. I would love to live well into 100. I hope to watch grandchildren (and maybe even great-grandchildren) grow up.”
Treena Orchard, author of Sticky, Sexy, Sad
“I'd like to be on this earth until we see a sizeable shift in the renewal of our cherished animal species who are dwindling to tiny numbers by the day. Animals, like children, are sacred messengers and they enrich my life in innumerable ways!”
Midlife Upgrade Co-founder Pamela DeRose releases a bestseller
Meet the serial entrepreneur and life pivoter who recently married her college boyfriend
Based in Chicago • midlifeupgrade.com • Instagram @pam.derose @wearemidlifeupgrade • Pamela DeRose on LinkedIn
We met Pamela DeRose just briefly when her friend and Midlife Upgrade cofounder Julie Fedeli joined the Founding MidstHer community in February 2025.
Now we’re excited to dig into Pam’s life, which she says is bursting with energy and excitement. “I have zero interest in slowing down,” she says of the release of Midlife Upgrade — A Girlfriend’s Guide to Finding Your Power in the Pause, co-written with Julie Fedeli. The book’s title is the same name of their Chicago-based coaching program, Midlife Upgrade, a community that supports women to crack the midlife code.
Launched May 30, 2025, the book is already a bestseller on Amazon — which, Pam says, “still makes me want to do a little happy dance every time I say it! This time of my life is all about reinvention, expansion, and stepping into my power more fully than ever before.”
You are a serial entrepreneur with a focus on women’s health and wellness, but you didn’t start as an entrepreneur. How have you shaped your path to be where you are today?
I’ve had a lot of different careers. I started in fashion after earning my undergraduate degree in the field. I spent years immersed in that world, working at both the retail and wholesale levels. From there, I ventured into architecture, freight and shipping, and even wholesale imports — each chapter taught me something new about resilience, reinvention, and what it means to build something from the ground up.
But through all those careers, there has always been one constant — my passion for women’s health and wellness. I’ve always felt called to support women as they navigate the messy, beautiful, ever-evolving journey of life.
Today, I feel incredibly grateful to have created a business that aligns with that passion — a space where I can empower women, share real talk, and help them step into their fullest, most unapologetic selves.
What’s the most surprising thing you’ve learned about yourself so far?
My resilience. Life has handed me plenty of plot twists — the soaring highs, the crashing lows, and some really deep valleys in between. But what’s surprised me most is my ability to keep getting back up.
No matter how hard I’ve fallen, I’ve always found a way to rise, learn, and come back stronger (and often a little wiser) than before. Those down times have been my greatest teacher.
Looking back, what advice would you give yourself on the eve of your 40th birthday?
I’d say, “Honey, hang on tight! You’re about to embark on a rough ride — there will be challenges you can’t even imagine yet. But here’s the thing: you’re going to be more than fine.
Every challenge will teach you something essential. You’ll come out on the other side with a heart that’s bigger, a spirit that’s stronger, and a well of compassion and empathy deeper than you ever thought possible.
Trust me: all those hard-won lessons? They’re going to shape you into the woman you were always meant to be. And you are going to help a lot of women navigate their own life challenges.”
Have you made any big changes lately?
A couple of years ago, I married my college boyfriend — yes, you heard that right. It’s wild and magical that he found his way back into my life after all those years.
Next up? We’re launching a Midlife Upgrade course to help women navigate midlife with real talk, practical tools, and plenty of sisterhood support.
To me, life is all about change — staying curious, saying yes to the unexpected, and being open to new possibilities.
This story was originally published here on the-midst.com.
For the last year or so, we’ve experimented somewhat quietly with our Founding MidstHer membership program. Our goal was to find out if women wanted to build a network of entrepreneurs, creators, and leaders with a united mission of helping women 35+ live healthy, fulfilling lives on their terms. Turns out many of you do.
More than ever before, women are making huge strides as change agents in women’s health and wellness, peri/menopause care, technology, and midlife storytelling and community building. The purpose of The Midst is to shine a light on these groundbreaking women — who include Midi Health CEO Joanna Strober, writer Alisa Kennedy Jones, and Detroit sound sculptor Gretchen Gonzales Davidson.
Founding MidstHers live around the world with jobs ranging from an Illinois couples and sex therapist to an L.A. dentist-turned-entrepreneur. Despite their geographical and professional differences, they share common interests and alignment on their why.
After getting to know our first Founding MidstHers, we’re taking the next step to grow the community by expanding the program perks and widening our promotions. We hope you’ll join us — because it takes a community to thrive in midlife.
Founding MidstHer benefits
A Founding MidstHer story featuring you
Access to the private Midst community Slack channel
Place community classifieds in The Midst Substack to promote your projects, business, people you want to meet, etc.
We will recommend you as a quotable source in stories that our writers produce for the-midst.com and The Midst Substack.
Full access to all content on The Midst Substack, including paywalled stories like our What Linkedin Doesn’t Say series.
Free access to any of our paid virtual events
Automatic access into giveaways
To become a Founding MidstHer, please upgrade your Midst Substack subscription to “Founding MidstHer” here.
If you have questions, please email me at amy@the-midst.com.
Hope to see you soon!